How to Clean a Barn!

Posted: December 31, 2014 in Uncategorized
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BIHK Instructions

Posted: December 31, 2014 in Uncategorized

Now that Derek Jeter has played his last game at Yankee Stadium, hopefully everyone can come back down to Earth and remember him for what he was – a pretty good hitting short stop. You would think Babe Ruth was retiring (ya know, someone who actually deserved the huge send off parade) based off all the media inflated attention given to the Yankees captain. Jeter was, and will always be a mediocre defender who could swing the bat pretty well.

His two most famous defensive plays were the most unnecessary things I’ve ever seen in baseball. I am, of course, referring to the time he caught a ball basically in fair territory and then ran a completely unnecessary 30 feet and dove headfirst into the stands. Now it may have been necessary for a baby giraffe to lose balance and fall into the stands, but is it really for a grown ass man who, by all accounts, had fully developed legs? And who could forget the time he impeded a ball to the plate by stopping it and relaying it to the plate at a snails pace. That’s it, your defensive highlight reel! #impressive

Now before everyone freaks out and stands up for #2, keep in mind I am not saying he was a bad player. Derek Jeter, in his prime, was a very good hitting shortstop, but in no way does that warrant all the current pomp and circumstance. Will Albert Pujols have the same send off? Did Chipper, Griffey, or Ripken receive the elaborate fair well tour? My final point is simple, the adoration for Jeter is evidently a product of him playing baseball in New York. There is no logical explanation. Which makes me say, “shame on you” for celebrating mediocrity like Domino’s Pizza.

Andrew Murky, MBA

Illinois vs. Washington Preview

Posted: September 13, 2014 in Uncategorized

The Illini have gotten off to a 2-0 start and Wes Lunt, to this point, looks like the savior we all hoped he would be. However, the Illini will face their biggest challenge to date when they take on the Washington Huskies in Seattle. Washington was preseason ranked 25th in the country, but after 2 unimpressive wins they have dropped out of the rankings – but are still receiving votes. Honestly, neither team has looked overly impressive during their wins.

So, do the Orange and Blue have a chance to upset the Huskies on the road? If Eastern Washington can hang around with Washington then so can the Illini. In fact, I expect the Illini to do way more than hang around, I expect them to win this game going away. Two things are critical in order for the Illini to pull off the upset. The offense MUST put points on the board early, and the defense MUST make some big plays. Either they force an early turnover or a couple 3 and outs. IT’S THAT SIMPLE!

Prediction: Illinois beats those Huskies Adrian Peterson style. AND what the hell is the difference between a switch and a stick?

Illinois-48

Washington-28

Andrew Murky, MBA

“I’m a mog – half man, half dog. I’m my own best friend.”

They Took Our Jobs!

Posted: September 5, 2014 in Uncategorized

Week two of college football kicks off tomorrow, and the Illini will matchup against Conference USA Juggernaut Western Kentucky.  In week one WKU did their best impression of the Illini offense by putting up nearly 60 points on Bowling Green.

De Took Errr Jobs!

The similarities did not stop on the offensive side of the ball as WKU gave up 30+ points to an inferior opponent.

De Derg Err Jerrbs!

Illini did look okay on the defensive side of the ball in week 1, but lets keep in mind they played an FSC opponent.  I do expect the Illini to prevail in this game as C-USA is for pussies.  Also, wtf is WKU’s mascot, a big red pile?

Prediction: Illini-45 WKU-38

Andrew Murky, MBA